I'm so tired. I remember being a teenager when sleep was so easy. Sleeping late on a Sunday was my favorite thing to do. It was comforting. My first experience with insomnia occurred about 4-5 years ago, at a time when I was really stressed about work. I've described it as if my brain was having a conversation with itself and it wouldn't shut up! It's a conundrum: I'm stressed and so I can't sleep, but because I can't sleep, it's stressing me out.
Ever since everything that happened this summer, I have had trouble sleeping well. I can sleep (eventually), but I'm just not getting a high-quality sleep. I have been taking a prescription sleep aid, but it's unfortunately not as effective as I would have hoped. I have to do so much just to ensure that I can get a good night's sleep -- exercise, not eat too late, take a sleeping pill, have a glass or two of wine, take a warm bath, and maybe even add a Tylenol PM on top. One silver lining: I really appreciate when I do get a good night's sleep. I just wish I could have more of them. At least Dr. Dave (my psychologist) understands, and encourages me to do whatever I need to do to sleep well, including the wine drinking. Gotta love when your doctor tells you to drink more wine.
Speaking of wine, I'm going to a friend's bachelorette party on Saturday. No Chippendales are expected (thank goodness), just lots of melty cheese (at the Melting Pot) and lots of wine. Here's another thing you just don't expect your doctor to tell you: "try to get a good hangover this weekend." Dr. Dave, I think I love you. Really, I think he wants me to enjoy the kind of stuff that I can't partake of when pregnant, like red wine and sushi, before we start trying again. So I'm working hard to get my fill of alcohol (have yet to go out to sushi, but that's on the agenda).
That wine drinking has impacted my knitting, and not for the better. I'm making a Christmas present, a sweater, and was working on the neckline last night, when I realized I had to rip the whole thing out because I had accidentally knit across the shoulder. This was after unknitting a couple of garter stitch rows that I thought were a mistake, and reknitting in reverse stockingnette, only to discover that it was supposed to be garter stitch afterall. Three glasses of rose does not lead to efficient finishing. Only after drinking a Coke Slurpee could I pull myself together enough to complete the neckline correctly. Pathetic.
So here are a my handmade items of the day (from yesterday, actually):
Thursday, October 19, 2006
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